My name is Jess. I’m a writer, tea enthusiast, landlord, hiker, yogi, and cannabis user.
At this point in my life, I use cannabis on a near daily basis.
It may sound like a lot, but daily cannabis use has transformed my life.
I was introduced to weed in college. The first time I ever smoked weed, I actually did it wrong. (Smoked like a cigar, not a cigarette. For that matter, I smoked cigarettes wrong too.)
It wasn’t until my junior year of college I started smoking with regularity, and it wasn’t until after I graduated and moved out of my parents’ house that I started buying my own weed.
At first, I used cannabis to help me sleep.
I’ve always been a poor sleeper.
Call it genetics, nerves, anxiety, loud brain- whatever. I’ve never been a fan of the dark and I’ve always been scared of being alone in the dark.
My bed in my studio apartment was perfectly positioned to see both entrances; the front and the bathroom window. The first week I lived there, I jumped at every noise and shadow. I started sleeping with the TV on just to cut through the pressing silence.
Flower was hard to come by for a girl with few friends, so I bought cartridges off my college sister who got them from various frat brothers. It wasn’t a high moment for me, having my freshman sister act as an intermediary, and I tried to find a replacement quickly.
I still remember the first I went into a head shop by myself. That’s a story for another time.
For a while, weed was an escape. I could come home, kick off my pants, take a drag and let the stress of the day ease off my shoulders. Weed helped me fall asleep easier, eased my stress, and had the added benefit of acting as a relaxant for my overly-involved intestines.
It wasn’t long before the vape pen was traveling with me, once even accidentally making through a TSA checkpoint. (#abolishtheTSA). It calmed me, relaxed me, and helped me sleep. All of these were important enough at home, but I traveled regularly for my job. I didn’t sleep well in hotels, struggled to find food that wouldn’t inflame flare-ups, and spent extra hours drinking around a boss I didn’t quite get along with.
Weed eased the feeling that I should be doing more, trying harder, being a better daughter, sister, friend and employee.
Weed gave me an edge, something that wasn’t quite kosher. For a middle-class white girl in the suburbs, a speeding ticket was as close as I had been to “the edge” before. (Admittedly, this wasn’t much closer, but hey, it was a step.)
I got high everywhere- the movie theater, the planetarium, weddings, my house, my parent’s garage. Flower was preferable, but the vape pen was subtle. I could fly with it (whoops). I could bring it on work trips, shoved in a cosmetics bags and used in the bathroom before bed.
Sometimes, weed is still an escape. It’s easy to lean into on a Friday night or slow Sunday. It still lightens the load, relaxes me, makes it easier to breathe.
But I don’t use weed like a party drug much these days.
I’ve discovered a different side of it, a different effect of blending strains.
And that’s what I want to talk about here.
How daily cannabis use as improved my life.
And even professionally