I’ve been out of the van for the entire month of April.
This wasn’t a planned break, but rather a spur-of-the-moment decision brought on by being unwell and desperately missing home. So I packed it up and spent a weekend crossing state lines until I was back in my hometown where most of my family lives.
I spent most of April staying with my sister at her new house and when the time came to leave, I still wasn’t ready. I am back on the road again and glad for it, but a piece of my heart cried out not to go.
It is easy to be in a house. There are insulated walls that protect you from weather, most of us have roofs that don’t leak, and you don’t realize what a luxury it is to have flush toilets until you go without. There’s plenty of hot water to do the dishes, I can change and shower in one private room, and it doesn’t cost me an arm and a leg to get clean laundry.
But beyond that, it felt good to be home again. Rochester holds a piece of my heart and I doubt that will ever change. I spent my entire life learning these roads and towns, developing opinions on bars and restaurants, and it was intimately familiar to be back. I don’t need Google to tell me how to get around or where to get dinner from or which grocery store is the best – I know. I don’t have to pack up and move every day from parking lot to parking lot. I even went a week without seeing the van when it was at the repair shop.
Life on the road can be solitary, even when you live with someone. There have been stretches of time where my husband and I have had only each other to converse with – and you run out of conversation faster when you spend all day, every day together. But getting around family is the opposite of solitary life, and it was a welcome reprieve to see them again.
Staying with my sister and her partner was comfortable and easy. It made me long for the space that comes with a single-family home and the closeness of seeing people you love every day.
I did not think twice about heading home with no warning – I knew I would have places to stay and people to see. I knew it would be easier to be there than where I was and I went without a second thought. Being in the van is a grand adventure but sometimes you need a break from the leap – and it helps to have a safe place to land.
As I head back out on the road, I am so glad I spent the last month at home. Adventures awaits but it’s easier to leave knowing I always have someplace to come back to.
